chicken little

Joined

• started 33 topics
• posted 564 times   see topics posted on
• send a message

Posts by chicken little

• 
  36

  Did You Start "Losing It" As A Witness?

  by minimus in

  1. jw
  2. friends

  were you emotionally or mentally unbalanced at any time while you were a jehovah's witness?.

  1. 
  2. 
  3. 
• 

  chicken little

  I lost the plot for about seven years....I was a zombie in that period. I took everything so seriously and found my self almost paranoid. I can still even to this day remember people I called on in the service going back 30 years. I would have guilt trips over not getting back to them and being blood guilty.

  My family suffered during this time. Conventions were torture, I spent much of the time in the rest rooms or in the car outside. I couldn't sit through the meetings I was afraid I would shout out something outrageous, my husband would walk me around the block to calm me down. I was so stressed out and suicidal, I felt life was a mess and I was of no use to anyone. Medicine helped. Then listening to the voice inside telling me there had to be another way to live than this.

  I know of many who are just like I was.
• 
  30

  Saturday Mornings

  by zarco in

  1. jw
  2. friends

  then: get up grumpy, shower, go to starbucks, leave magazine to start time, drive to kingdom hall, hope to be able to work with friends in service so we can do just a few doors and then calls and an early lunch.. .

  now: get up when i wake up, make coffee, read the boards, read the wsj and sf chronicle, wait for wife to wake up, take dog on a walk and decide what fun things to do in the bay area this weekend.. i love my weekends now!.

  zarco.

  1. 
  2. 
  3. 
• 

  chicken little

  Here comes the confession. While in I would feel ill on a Saturday, the thought of the service, then rush home quick lunch, out the door for the meeting, get home at 6ish shattered. Then be expected to be on service next day.. wife of elder so supposed to set example. Many times I would be so sick on a Saturday, yet still bug my husband to go, for appearances sake. I ALWAYS had a guilty conscience...never felt happy even when I was doing alot.

  Now we love our weekends, brunch with friends, time with the family and around the home. We go away to our summerhouse quite often without feeling we are materialistic hedonists. Life is good!
• 
  33

  Learning the "Truth" Is not true is like...................

  by foolsparadise in

  1. jw
  2. friends

  after 33 years of being mind controlled at 5 meetings a week, field service meetings, special day assembly, curcuit assembly,district assembly, finding out "the truth" is just a big hoax is like getting punched in the stomach-uppercut in the jaw-being kicked in the balls from behind and then having the rug ripped out from under you and smashing your head on the ground.

  what was it like for everyone else?.

  1. 
  2. 
  3. 
• 

  chicken little

  Years of depression while in the org. Feeling that life was to be fought through. Always a feeling that I was not listening to something inside of me. When I did listen to that voice, then the floodgates opened. I started to use my intelligence and there was no going back. Went to a meeting one evening after the floodgates had opened and could not get my legs to work, I sat rooted to the car seat holding on to the steering wheel for dear life. That did it....body caught up with the mind...no way back. Went home and never looked back since. Feel at times an utter fool for believing what I did. Have learnt to forgive myself, as the witnesses so rightly say...nobody is perfect!! Haha.

  All the best to you.....enjoy your life!!
• 
  57

  Rehab has been very interesting, but ended nightmarishly....

  by oompa in

  1. jw
  2. friends

  hi guys...oompa here.

  was i in rehab for alcohol addiction or jwd addiction!?!?

  !......no computers or cellphones allowed so i have been awol awhile..... ya, i finally made my self sick enough on booze to realize i was really sick and tired of being sick and tired....so checked myself into rehab without any planning at all and while wife was out of town on a family retreat...it was a a very desperate moment in my life, and i was extremely physically and emotionally sick....i was so desperate i took zero time to reseach where to go, but called an old school friend who said rehab had saved his life and he made the calls and actually took me and helped me check in to the place he went to 5 years ago.

  1. 
  2. 
  3. 
• 

  chicken little

  Welcome back Oompa,

  You took a very difficult step to go to the re-hab. That still stands as a great accomplishment in itself. Many of these help institutions are desperate for cash and that may push them to oversell themselves. Very hurtful and unkind to use these methods on people that are so vunerable. Write a formal complaint to there head office.

  Keep up the hard work and your AA attendance, we exjws are very sensitive to the "religious" imput in the meetings, but I would be like you and re-define the words to suit the way my beliefs stand.

  Well done old chap, keep working hard. Don't give up, life is good at its core....you can live your life without the booze and enjoy it even more.

  Hugs

  Chicken little
• 
  12

  The claws are out!

  by wantstoleave in

  1. jw
  2. friends

  i just wanted to say a big thank you to everyone on the board.

  i haven't been here that long but from the time i've spent here, i feel very comfortable.

  i've been on boards before (witness ones) where everyone is so opinionated, heartless and holier than thou....but this one is so different.

  1. 
  2. 
  3. 
• 

  chicken little

  Welcome to the board...enjoy!
• 
  38

  Cola at the District Convention

  by lepermessiah in

  1. jw
  2. friends

  remember some of the garbage served at the district conventions?.

  i was at the dollar store today and noticed they started carrying "shasta" cola.. i started laughing because they used to serve that skunk water at the district conventions when i was a kid.. they always brought in the cheapest, nastiest soda they could buy.. one year we had something called vess cola - that was actually worse than the shasta!

  then, they ran out on sunday and had to buy pepsi from the local distributor - we were all rejoicing!!.

  1. 
  2. 
  3. 
• 

  chicken little

  When I first visited Denmark, I nearly died to see they served light beer at lunch...2.5% alcohol and everyone loved it...I was shocked to my puritan bones. After I moved there I got quite used to it..haha...then they scrapped the whole eating and drinking thing in favour of huge home made cooler boxes. Of course more work for the mothers to prepare each day before the 5.30 am travel to the convention site. Woe betide the heathen that sneaked out to get fast food...they were addressed from the platform as disrespectful of the convention arrangements. (I have seen huge long queues at the sweetie van and hot dog van outside the grounds...good business for them). The best treat we had was at Twickenham, London back in the early eighties...black forest gateaux...yummy!
• 
  33

  paranoid and ready to officially leave!

  by leftchica in

  1. watchtower
  2. scandals

  so i officially realized today that i am paranoid!!

  everytime i hear a car door slam outside i peek out the window.

  my blinds are closed and the telivision is on low.

  1. 
  2. 
  3. 
• 

  chicken little

  Welcome leftchica,

  Hope you have enjoyed your responses to your thread. It is so important to no that you are by no means alone with your fears. We have all been there to a

  lesser or greater degree. I was given this advice...when they knock or ring, say "Thank you for your concern, but I have no need at this time to discuss

  anything with you. My husband and I are regularly taking our problems to Jehovah in prayer and we will find our way through whatever difficulties we have.

  We do not need any further calls from you, but if we do need you we know where to find you. Please respect our decision".

  They cannot argue with this....they have to leave it alone.

  Do not live in fear, take the power away from them. Consistantly refuse to discuss your reasons with anyone, we stonewalled all conversations trying to get us to explain ourselves. Be kind, friendly when you meet anyone from the kh, just don't get into it.

  All the best, enjoy your freedom of mind and heart.

  Chicken little
• 
  8

  Learn From A Great Teacher (repost)

  by garyneal in

  1. watchtower
  2. bible

  sorry for repeating myself but it appears that i placed this topic in the wrong category.

  since i cannot seem to edit it or change it's category, i figured i'd repost it here where it may be more appropriate.. the watchtower publishes a book for parents to read to their children called "learn from a great teacher.

  " my wife has had copies of this book for years and has read them to my little girl in the past.

  1. 
  2. 
  3. 
• 

  chicken little

  The old pink book was harmless (more or less). The new book is very harmful. There are pictures in there that would really scare a child. The armageddon illustrations are awful. I made up my mind when that book came out that I would not read it to my little boy. I was mentally on my way out of the witnesses at that time. There is also a very spooky rag doll in a few of the illustrations...that freaked me out too.
• 
  28

  those oh so spritual answers...

  by tigeress in

  1. jw
  2. experiences

  i had my own flash of light the other day.

  i realised somthing about sister perfect, you know the type who would perfectly hold her nose above everyone else, and occasionaly condesend to talk to one of us lowly ones, she was so perfect she farted chanel no 5!.

  the other thing she would do was those oh so spirtaul answers, the ones with the whole paragraph and watchtower inculded in it.

  1. 
  2. 
  3. 
• 

  chicken little

  Hej Tigress,

  Staying on medication is no sin when you need it. It is self defeating to fall back into a deep depression just so you can say you are free from medication....I know, been there tried it. When eventually you are ready to come off the meds, you will know. I stopped two years ago when all the external factors in my life were good. The internal chaos had disappeared, I just slowly reduced the amount I took (with doctors agreement), until I stopped taking them altogether. This may or may not happen for you.....don't beat yourself up over it. Enjoy life. The self righteous sister you mentioned in your thread is hollow, uttering things she thinks will get her brownie points. Deep down many of these women are so depressed and unhappy.

  Love

  Chicken little
• 
  21

  My mother is really sick--vocal chord disorder

  by bluecanary in

  1. jw
  2. experiences

  my mother was just diagnosed with vocal chord disorder.

  it's rarely fatal but it feels like she's dying whenever she has an attack.

  the symptoms are very similar to heart attack and stroke-trouble breathing, pressure in the chest, numb lips and tongue.

  1. 
  2. 
  3. 
• 

  chicken little

  Hello Blue Canary,

  So sorry for your mum and her health problems. I know nothing about this disorder, it must be very frightening to experience it. I wonder if slow breathing and calming techniques would help when an attack comes on? Many times we panic when we experience strange body reactions. Calming the heart rythmn and breathing may help. I hope you get more info and can be of support to your mum.

  Much love, and keep us posted on any info you glean...it maybe someone knows of this condition.

  Chicken Little